Hello Eight!, the Ira way

 

                                Hello Eight! 

This year as we ring in our little human beings 8th birthday, we are amidst nature doing things she loves and also doing absolutely nothing :). 

The last year has been a journey where we have seen her grow, expand her horizons, learn to deal with tough moments and accept when someone says no, learn to make new friends, learn that it is ok not to like some things, learn that being kind and loving is the most important thing in the whole wide world. 

Us

                                My Precious

                   Chocolate cake and cheers

                            Birthday Morning

Summing up eight interesting moments / things she did last year that were new experiences and now are a part of the Pramadhs' stories, like forever. Sharing these, with eight E adjectives that describe her and her experiences! 

Eager- After being home schooled last year, made new friends in her new school and travelled in a school bus for the first time ever, even going on a short trip to the bugs hotel. 

Energetic- One thing she missed the most during peak covid was her play time with the apartment friends. As things eased, she managed a lot of play time, also took her karate belt exam in person, along with attending a nanchack workshop. 

Exciting- Over the years, Ira has grown to be quite an avid reader. There are also few days when she doesn't touch a book. But when she reads, we have had constant reading happening. She started the Harry Potter books this year and finished the series. Has taken to Roald Dahl, Enid Blyton, Ruskin Bond, David Walliams books very keenly too. She reads and also shares the stories. This holiday, The Diary of a Wimpy Kid has got her attention. She also did a writing workshop with Amar Chitra Katha this summer. Am sure excited to see her churn out new stories :) 

Elaborate- Prashant is a process person and has inculcated that in Ira. Be it her morning and newpaper reading routine or other life skills. She recently learnt to negotiate while buying plantain leaves at the Yeshwantpur Market. She asked lot of questions, got the process aorted in her head and followed instructions to the tee. 

Earthy- Her name means Earth and she is quite at home amidst nature. Ofcourse, doesn't like the leeches much, but this year has heard owls hoot, peacocks call and many other birds. This was the first time she did 2 camping trips in the span of a few weeks, with small treks and also slept under the sky in a tent. 

Earnest- She tried a few things with utmost earnestness this year. Made breakfast for us first Sunday of a few months. Overtime, life took over and we lost the rhythm but hope to get back to those little chef mornings. She does partake in food prep when Papa cooks :). She also has been writing to her pen friend, Sonali. Sometimes they areletters, sometimes apost card. An interaction she takes quite seriously. 

Empirical- We encouraged her to do journalling through the year for various experiences. So, her little treasure trove has small handmade books with many things written about little things she did. Be it a story, a song, writing how she is feeling or about her travels and holidays. 

Effervescent- Being parents to her is a life full of surprises. Sometimes, she says the philosophical things with a straight face. Eg. Mamma, Covid is here to stay. We must move on. This was when the Pramadhs were going through lot of health challenges and mamma was frustrated and stressed. Or when she dishes out potty jokes teaming with Papa, her partner in crime. She has her inner circle and is aware that her Joi will do the most crazy and kiddy thing with her, like having a lollypop. She has learnt to navigate relationships, share how she feels and find her place in a group. 

      A Cute message from our favourite Kalpan Dida, along with big bear hugs

27th May 2022 began with Mamma and Papa waiting for Ira to wake up. She had declared last night that she is eight and will sleep in late. She was up at 7. 30am (quite late in comparison to our normal waking up time). 

We gifted her some clothes, some books and card games. Harish from Varshini had made puri for breakfast :) She wore her new jeans (she wanted distressed jeans as a gift) and tee with the HP sorting hat in sequens and posed for Papa. Our heart skipped a beat, wondering when did she grow up so much. Lunch had fish and there was chicken curry for dinner. We managed to also get a chocolate cake from the town nearby. With Dadu-Dida, Meshodadu-Mashidida, Joy, Rony, Malu on the video call, we sang the birthday song marking year 8. Our dear friends, H&N joined us for the day with their nephew. 

               Manjarabad fort, posing adults and kids with swag

To family and friends, far and near, who sent their love for our little girl through calls and messages, Thank you! 

Let the #EffablesAtEight begin! 

#Ira #Iraisms #IraAtEight #EffablesAtEight #Pramadhs #EightBirthday #HappyBirthday #BirthdayHoliday #Happiness #Love #Gratitude 

Plantain leaves and Negotiation, the Ira way

 

Bangalore has been seeing a lot of rains and some gloomy weather. Just perfect for Papa to make his famous Chicken Dum Biryani. 

What ensued this Thursday was some good planning and prepping. 

Mamma was in a session and Ira and Papa went to Yeshwantpur to buy plantain leaves. Given the traffic and hassle of parking, Ira was given the responsibility to Buy the plantain or 'yele'. 

Prashant told her to buy 5 leaves and it would be about Rs. 25. Gave her 100 Rs. He also primed her to converse in Kannada with the shop keeper. 

Our girl went and asked him for the yele and the cost of it. He wanted to knownif they are buying just one or a bunch of it. On knowing her requirement, he said Rs.30. She got back to Papa and told him about the ask, then went back and told him, "Ayidu yele, 25Rs". He agreed, she paid, got back the change and happily walked back to the car. 

She came home and told me that she negotiated while shopping today. 

A small experience but an essential one. To understand that it is important to ask and ensure fairness. I do hope she hones this skill going ahead and takes this to different aspects of life. One chapter of being independent, assertive and outspoken. 

And yeah, the dum biryani was yummy. Coal was used to give the smoky authentic flavor. We enjoyed the biryani, while continuing to savor the hillstation weather in Ooru. 

#Ira #IraAtSeven #StoriesAtSeven #Parenting #LearningNegotiation #Us #Gratitude #Happiness #ChickenDumBiryani #IraAndPapa 

A Mother's Day letter from A Perfect Mother to her Daughter

                   The cheek to cheek pic <3 

 

Dearest Ira, 

Writing to you after a long time. Someday, I hope you read all these letters and blogs and see how you brightened our lives, every step of the way. We have ofcourse shared the challenges too. You will have memories of some and some would have faded into the convoluted paths of the brain, but then these pieces of writings will remain. 

This Sunday, 8th May 2022 was Mother's Day. I love these innumerable days, the over the top celebrations, the subtle acknowledgements, all of it that we see around us. 

For me, the day was quiet in my head. You made a beautiful card for me, with flowers of my favourite colour and  a pop up inside the card. Then, you and Papa said I should buy you ice cream. We also cooked a meal together. For us, food is and has always been an expression of love. You spent the evening at your Dadu bari, while we went for a play. 

The day with these small moments was remarkable for me. But there was a realisation of many things as the day passed. 

The last one year, there have been moments when I have found parenting hard. 

Moments when you wanted to do something with me, but I was just too tired to be a part of it. 

Moments when you seeked my attention, but I was too preoccupied with everything that was happening in our lives. 

Moments when I raised my voice on you for something so small, only to later realise that I was displacing my anger and it was not fair on you. 

Moments when I felt inadequate and felt may be am not doing enough for you. 

Being your Mamma is one of the best things that ever happened to me, but being The Perfect Mamma is hard, because in our heads, we create an image that is almost impossible to match. 

So, this year, I did things that will help me be The Perfect Mamma for you. And to be that, I had to put myself first. 

I acknowledged that there are moments when am tired and it is ok to not be able to do anything with you. Like I told you, "Mamma is tired. Can we do something else? "

Moments when I realised that I wasn't listening and then asked you again what you were saying, accepting that I was distracted. I know you felt bad but then the moment was such. 

I have been more emotional and more angry in these last two years than I have ever been and it was unfair to lose my cool on you. A little voice raised and you would be in tears and it broke my heart. I felt guilty for days. I now make the effort to not do this. Am not there yet, but am trying. 

I love our moments together. Reading, visiting family and friends, doing art and crafts together, your school works and those nature walks. However, there were times when I felt it wasn't enough. So, I had to take  a step back and think. Thankfully, your Papa balances the pragmatic side of parenting. 

In these two years, I realised how easy it is to succumb to what we think is expected of mammas. To put ourselves after our children. I learnt that only if I put myself first, can I be the perfect mamma for you. 

So, to my mental and physical health, to saying no, to finding peace in not being perfect. 

I love you and will always be there for you. But to be there for you, I have to be there for myself. And that will be The Perfect Mamma for you. 

So, Happy Mother's Day to me. 

Love you always, 

Your Mamma

#Ira #Iraisms #IraAtSeven #StoriesAtSeven #Love #Happiness #Gratitude #HappyMothersDay #Parenting #Us #BeingAMother #Pramadhs