Happy 75th Independence Day! Conversations and art, the Pramadh way

India celebrates its 75th Independence Day today. 

                        Pramadhs Create Art

As we spoke of freedom and the importance of today, I asked Ira what does freedom mean to her? What does it mean for people to be free? 

Ira: What I think freedom or free means to be in my opinion means that a person, it could be a male or  a female or  a boy or  a girl wants to do whatever they feel like. 

Mamma: And what is it that they would like to do? 

Ira: Anything that makes them happy or is good for their country

Mamma: What would you like to do as  a free person? 

Ira: I would follow my dream and just be who I want to be and not let people push me around saying like you know,  you have to be this! 

Mamma: So, today is what? 

Ira: Independence Day

Mamma: What do you want to tell India? 

Ira: I want to tell India, "Happy Birthday India".

While Ira understands that we can love whoever we want, she is yet to comprehend the gender spectrum completely. But she is sure that everyone should have the freedom to do what they want. 

We three together worked on  a simple piece of art today. The hands (no political representation) here are an ode to the hands that grow our food, that feed us, that fought for the freedom, that works to keep us United, that strives to keep us safe; hands that teach us, hands that create, hands that write our stories and hands that hold our hands. Every hand tells a story, in all colours and hues. 

Our dear friend Dolly Koshy posted her thoughts today and it resonates with us completely. Here is what she says,  

"Indian at heart; global foodie

Independence Day Breakfast.

On this  independence day let's keep in mind that what we eat or who we love or what faith we follow or don't follow doesn't determine how much we love our country. 

Let's try to be independent from the shackles of our mind.

True freedom is to value not only our own independence, but also respect others’ choices. 

Let's have freedom from fear, violence and discrimination. Let's have freedom to question those in power and our elders.

#IndiaIndependenceDay #freedom "

So, also sharing our plates of happiness and gratitude today. Our way to share our love for our country. 

Sweet Potato Parathas with Mango pickle, Curd and Chutney Pudi

Rice, Masoor dal, Banana Stem fry, Salad, Roopchand Fish fry and Fish Curry

Like Ira says, Happy Birthday India! 

#75IndiaIndependenceDay #India #Indians #Ira #Pramadhs #Iraisms #IraAtSeven #StoriesAtSeven #Happiness #Gratitude #Love #Freedom #ConversationsWithIra #PramadhsCreateArt #ValueFreedom #RespectChoices 

Celebrating 'Freedom', the Ira-way

Dear Ira,

It has been a while since I have written a letter to you. It is also a year since I first wrote to you about our Independence Day and the meaning of  'Freedom'.
Papa also shared his thoughts on freedom with you and urged you to 'fight' for it.

                                                                  #FreedomtoBe

A year now and while the fundamental thought remains the same, the boundaries of the definition somehow has expanded. You turned three recently and with it we also discovered new emotions that you now feel, that you now express quite vehemently and new actions that you display.

1. Freedom to Express
We always strive to give you the freedom to express what you feel. As parents, traversing the so called moral pathway, while we need to ensure that you are polite, we also encourage you to say what's on your mind. This is essential for you and every little and big human being around. So, when you say you don't love us in a moment of despair at the refused toy or you call Papa a 'monster', we feel happy because you are blatantly expressing what you feel. We are living in times when this freedom of expression is being challenged and we hope it doesn't get any worse in the times to come.

2. Freedom to Say No and Protest
The last few months have been an eye opening experience, because you have begun to say no and protest and how! The protest is often accompanied by a loud cry, a few moments when no reason works and kinaesthetic expressions rise. You protest when we say no to an extra muffin or at times insist that you wind your work up. Always remember that we may or may not agree to you on several things as you grow up. You may feel the urge to protest, to reason , to state your stance and you must know today, that you will always have the freedom to say no and protest. While the parent in us may be annoyed, worried and disappointed, always remember that 'to protest is your choice and your right'. Always remember that your consent is yours and no one can take it away from you. The entire aspect of consent is more complex and warranties a complete post someday; for now, just remember that, "It is fine to say no to your parents and the world".

3. Freedom to Choose
You now make choices- big and small. What to wear, what you would like to take for snacks to school (only condition being fruits), whether the hairband or the clip as an accessory that day, which book to read, which activity to do at home, whether you want 'alu bhaja' or 'alu bhate' (potato fry or mashed potato), whether you decide to wear a 'normal' dress on a day when the school wants traditional attire, whether you want to go down and play in the evenings or not. As you assert your freedom to choose, it is a big lesson for us to learn to step back and let you be. So, the world doesn't end if you wear uncoordinated clothes to school, if you want muskmelon three days a week, if you choose to stay at home and play by self, if you go down to the apartment play space and choose not to speak a word to anyone, if you choose to wear 3-4 clips and a hairband the same day. These may seem small choices but these help you take the initiative and help you assert your freedom. As enthusiastic parents, we like to sometimes control and create that perfect FB pic, but we all know how many shots that usually takes :)

4. Freedom to Express Love the way you want to
Papa or Mamma: "Why do you want this Ira?"
Ira: "Because I love it"
The 'It' could be anything- animate, inanimate, food, toy, books, the limited screen time.
Papa or Mamma: "I love you Ira"
Ira, some days...: "I love you too"
Ira, most days...: No response. Stoic silence
The freedom to love and the freedom to express it is important. Prashant and I have always encouraged hugs, kisses and expressions of love. Ira, you are very expressive, albeit in your comfort zones and with some people. There are days when multiple hugs and group hugs happen and there are days when you refuse to hug. We are particular to let you know that you have the choice to hug or not to hug. It is beyond annoying when a child is forced to hug, because we at that split second are disrespecting their freedom and their physical space. What we have discovered is that your greatest way to express love is when you share the 'mishit doi' (sweet curd) with us. Love cant get more simple and sweet.


5. Freedom to 'Be'
All choices and notions of freedom will fade into oblivion if we don't let you be. So, this overrides everything. You some days choose to be a baby as you wake up and want more cuddles. Some days,you are the brave little girl who gets up from a fall, says ,"This is jujube" and moves on. Some days, you are supergirl, with all the superpowers in the world and some days, you are the little one we brought home, wondering how you have changed us forever.

So, as India celebrates her birthday today, let us celebrate another year of discovering the myriad notions of freedom.

Love you,
Your Mamma


#Ira #Iraisms #TalesAtThree #CelebratingFreedom #FreedomtoExpress #FreedomtoSayNoandProtest #FreedomtoChoose #FreedomtoExpressLovethewayyouwantto #Freedomto'Be'
#FreedomfromGenderNorms
#CreativeFreedom
#Freedomtohaveandshowoffthatsuperpower
#FreedomtobeSelf

'Freedom' deciphered, the Ira-way

Dear Ira,

You went to school today, dressed in white to celebrate Independence Day. A day that celebrates the freedom that we have and nurture.

# Celebrating Freedom

Freedom is very precious, the freedom to make choices and the freedom to be free. All the things that you do, your imagined plays, your activity time, your creative conversations...all of it reflect elements of freedom. The meaning of the word is simple, while the hues it takes may differ as you grow up. Every year, your Papa and I will see you expressing your freedom in a whole new way.

Buying toys and clothes is always a fascinating experience. We love the way you run to the 'ball' segment, each time we visit a leading sports item store; we love the way you choose the school bag you want or the tee shirt that you shall wear, irrespective of which segment it is categorised into. We just a few days back got you your first kitchen set and what ensued was a three course meal. Understanding that food and kitchen are for all and to take pride in that rice, dal and grated carrot sabji you are making with elan. You love your Ben-the plane and Thomas-the engine and so do we.

#Freedom from Gender Norms

Your recent creative pursuits keep us on our toes and we try and find new ways that we think will make activity time interesting for you. Am thrilled that you have taken to the blocks that were bought at a fair and you are happily 'painting' away. Flowers and Butterflies have added both the sunshine and colour to your activity time. Ofcourse, you want to now paint the flowers all over!

#Creative Freedom

Every morning when you wake up and say, Good morning and ensure Bonnie (a Lion, soft toy) also does the same, you are filled with a zeal to take on the day. Ofcourse, as parents we want to see all this and more in you. When we look back years later, you will realise that, that moment when you wore that mask we made and posed like you had super powers just made the super powers a reality. The super power to be uninhibited, the super power to be amazingly animated and dramatic and enjoy every moment of it; the super power to not worry about expectations but do what you love, the super power to be yourself.

#Freedom to have and showoff that super power

#Freedom to be self

So, my baby, keep that sense of freedom, respect it, embrace it and thrive in it.

Love you,
Your Mamma