We are in this together- Ira begins Elementary Montessori

Ira had to attend her first online introductory class today for Elementary Montessori. Yes, we have chosen to continue in the Montessori system for a few more years.

Every year, the day one of school is a special day and she absolutely loves going back to school after her 2.5 month summer break. We do our hugs and kisses and also a pic by the school before she walks into her new year of montessori. That is another Pramadh tradition.

This year, the school began sending us some activites every week for the last 6 weeks. The activities were customised to the child. It was a combination of Reading, some writing, Math, some experiential activities and spanned the three languages they learn- English, Hindi and Kannada. Mamma promptly made a Google doc and shared with Papa, to monitor the weekly activities and also wrote in a book for Ira's reference. We had already been doing some English, Hindi , Math or Kannada writing almost everyday. These school activities added an extra punch to that activity hour planned by Mamma, as it was assigned by school. Some days, Ira was full motivated and some days, Mamma and Papa had to keep telling her that's her activity for the day. The activities assigned were divided between us and we managed to keep to the calendar more or less. As cases rose, we knew that it would be some time before school begins and we also prepared Ira for the fact that she will be home for a few more weeks and have us do the school activities with her. We realised that we have to plan our work accordingly. Papa is slowly getting back to work and Mamma is beginning her online training sessions, slowly and steadily. We now not only have to calendar and plan the days but even minutely plan the hours of the day.

The introductory session email came and Ira was super excited that she would see her classmates and meet her aunties (the teachers). Today was a session where the teacher asked them how they were doing, whether they have been doing the activities that was sent by school the last few weeks. Ira with a little nudge showed what she wrote and what she drew. The teacher told the students how they are missing them and waiting for them to get back to school, but that will take some time. She reassured them that during the next few weeks, they will continue to send some activities which they will have to do with the help of their parents and we can reach out to her if we need any help. She will also do a one to one with each student every week to understand how they are finding the activities. It was a 30 minute session and just that did wonders. Ira was happy to see her teacher and classmates and understood that this will happen once every few days.

I attended the session with Ira today and I have to admit that the manner in which the children were reassured and gently reminded that they have to do the little activities assigned to them.

 This is all new, the 'new normal'. Ira asked her teacher what she was doing and she told her that she is at school preparing activities for the kids. I am a teacher and I teach Post Grad and Research students. I have to tell you that being a teacher is hard work and this year, it just got harder. They are customising activities for kids, putting in longer hours, getting accustomed to new modalities of teaching and have the humongous responsibility of doing it all well. These little kids look up to them and listen to everything they say. Can we adults even comprehend that pressure.

We as parents can sit on the other side and wonder are our children learning enough, is this year going to help them academically and even have doubts on the fees and the effectiveness of the methods. This is a time for us to let go and remember that every year when we are at work, our children are with them for the day. This year, the hours may be lesser and the medium may have changed. Everyone is adjusting to this and doing their best. Educating a child is team work. Team work between their teachers and us parents. We are not on the opposite sides, we are on one side goading the child, encouraging the child and making sure the little human being is garnering skills, interacting and learning to deal with the world.

As we get set for this roller coaster of a year, a big shout out to all the teachers and all the amazingness they bring into the lives of our little human beings.

We are in this together.

#Ira #Iraisms #IraAtSix #StoriesAtSix #ElementaryMontessori #Education #Happiness #Gratitude #Parenting #Teaching #OnlineLearning #ElementaryMontessoryDayOne 

Montessori Year Four, Our 'Gratitude' is Yours!

Ira just completed four years of Montessori. Every year closes with a year end party for the kids and they get a chance to say their byes before they head for the summer vacation.

This year ofcourse it has all been different. We stopped sending Ira to school after 9th March 2020, the day the Government of Karnataka closed schools for pre KG and KG students. A decision taken at the right time.

On 16th March, we went for the PTM and heard from the teacher about Ira. This year was a lot about learning to deal with her social surroundings and managing her social relationships. Academically, she had broken into writing, began learning more complex concepts and also two vernacular languages.

But this year, if there is one thought we are Grateful for is that Ira became more comfortable being herself. Too young for that, you may say. But this is the age when peer influences begin to impact a lot and she learnt to be assertive even if she thought differently from the group. We are sure it wasn't easy for her, but regular conversations at home when we told her that she must be happy to be herself and be happy with what she has.

All those moments when she sang a song out of tune and did it with so much gumption, loudly declared she loves superheroes and wants to be a warrior princess, she said that she likes rainbow on everything, she said that she knows what she wants and that moment when she tells us that she thinks with her mind and keeps things in her memories.

So, we are grateful for a year that clearly taught us through our little human being-
"Be You
Believe in Yourself".

#Ira #Iraisms #IraAtFive #TalesAtFive #Parenting #Gratitude #Happiness #LittleHumanBeings #MontessoriChild #MontessoriYearFourGratitudeNote 

Gratitude…in leaps and bounds! Thank you ‘Year Two’

March 23^rd, 2018 marked the final day of Year two in Montessori for Ira and her final PTM was on 26^th March, 2018. Keeping to the ‘Pramadh’ tradition, this year too we would like to share ‘our’ gratitude list, albeit a little differently this year!

This year the conversations have grown- more complex, more intriguing and more thought provoking. Our little human being gives us a peek into her world through the stories she tells, the experiences she shares and the many little things she doesn’t tell. So, our gratitude stories this year are through conversations.

“Look Mamma, I wrote ‘A’”

This happened just this week. In Montessori environment, children discover writing by the age of 4-4.5 years. We were told that she has just exploded into writing. She writes 1 and 7 but was yet to discover alphabet writing. Her third day of holiday and out of the blue while playing, she picks up a post it and next thing I know, she tells me- “Look Mamma, I wrote ‘A’”. P and I love the Montessori way of learning and we are thrilled to bits with how she is learning things at her time and her pace. Her world is blossoming in its own little way.

What did you do today? “Nothing”

One of the things we talk about post school is how was her day, did she eat her snacks and lunch and what she did. Most days, the response is "Nothing". We have overtime learnt that ‘Nothing’ is good because suddenly one day, she began talking of geometry and binomial cubes! We still have very little idea what they mean though.

“Play with me, keep your phone away”

We had made conscious attempts to introduce the screen much later to her and also in a limited fashion. What worked for us is also that we do not have a TV. Over the last year, the screen time has increased- we have tab days, movie days, game days. However, the access to mobiles is still very limited. There are times when we are guilty of being on the phone while playing with her or talking to her. She promptly tells us, “

Play with me, keep your phone away”. The parent in us does a little pride walk!

“Hmmm…ya, the sault (salt) is fine”

P and I love food and love cooking. Ira is gladly a part of our cooking endeavors at home. She helps clean methi, makes cutlets with papa, helps sprinkle salt on salads, helps make omelettes and even makes strawberry smoothie in the mixie. So, when we cook, she is a keen observer and when we taste to ensure salt and masala is fine, we also ask her to tell us. She will take a taste, pause, have a thoughtful expression and say, “Hmmm…ya, the sault (salt) is fine”.  We both believe cooking is an essential skill and we hope she takes to it like fish to water.

“You know, I was winding one activity and went to take another. I didn’t realize it was home time. Silly me!”

Yes, the sentences are that long at times. Ira loves going to school and also seems to enjoy her activities. One day when we went to pick her up, she was one of the last ones to come out. While we waited and wondered what was happening, she excitedly came out and shared how she was so busy with the activities that she didn’t realize it was home time. The glee on her face and the chuckle that followed this line was priceless, “You know, I was winding one activity and went to take another. I didn’t realize it was home time. Silly me!”

“You know he is my best friend”

This year, she has slowly begun to express about her friends. The list does differ at times, but some names are constant. From holding hands and walking into school, to spending play dates chatting and fighting incessantly , sitting in the car with arms around eachothers neck to sharing a cookie between them. They even plan to visit each other and promptly tell their parents about their plans. What a wonderful world she has discovered- the world of friends! Ofcourse , she vehemently tells us, “You know he is my best friend”

“Aiyo, it went into the wrong hole”

Ira can now wear her own clothes - simple tees and shorts and frocks. The other day she excitedly says, Mamma, see I can wear my own tee shirt. Next moment, she says, “aiyo! It went into the wrong hole”. It is these little moments that we remember. Ofcourse, there have been moments when she has worn yellow pants, a green tee and gone to school because that is what she wants! Little Miss Independence, ain’t she?

 “Dadu and Dida will do everything?!”

This year there were days when dadu and dida had to get her ready to school and drop and pick her up. While she was primed, she would want to know which activities would they do. This is because while papa gets her ready for school, mamma gets breakfast and lunch ready on school days usually. So, while she got set for it, she would insist on knowing, “Dadu and Dida will do everything?!” It has been a learning for her and an experience for them. Ofcourse, Dida packed her fave phulka and alu sabji for lunch, while dadu ensured she wore her seatbelt while he drove her to school.

 “A, I want one more gobi paratha”

As this year drew to a close, and work got extremely busy for us, we had a dear friend who helped with dropping and picking up Ira. One of those mornings when P was travelling and I dropped Ira off at her place early mrng, she got down from the cab and gave ‘A’ a big bear hug! I stood there grinning and swelling with pride and saying a note of thank you. You need a village to raise a child, you need friends who make your child their own.  Amidst her busy mrng, the friend made gobi parathas for the kids and the stamp of approval was of course Ira eating one gobi paratha and then saying, “A, I want one more gobi paratha”. They talk to eachother on first name basis and that often is how Ira relates to the people closest to her.

“Will s/he be there when I wake up”

A line our little girl often tells when our friends visit us. She loves having people over and is used to waking up to a morning when friends have stayed over. This year has been about discovering how at times she hates saying goodbyes. Some goodbyes have been tear filled too. Other times, she makes them promise they will visit again and then excitedly goes to press the lift button for them.  She recently made ‘Old N’ promise that he will visit her next week and only then she will let him go. Each time Joy and Rony visits, there is a shrill excited scream as they enter and when they leave, she wants to know when will they visit next. We wish this innocence stayed because we need to let the people who matter stay in our lives and treasure their presence.  Ofcourse, we have to creatively answer each time she asks,  “Will s/he be there when I wake up?”

“One more book please!”

Some evenings, we spend playing jenga or doing the jigsaw puzzles or reading books. We have been circulating books from her collection so that we read new books every few weeks. So, some books are strategically hidden away at times and some made to appear on the book shelf. There are some evening when we are on the 6^th or 7^th book and a little request pops in, “One more book please!”

“Ira Pramadh has gifted this to Papa”

She loves scribbling, drawing, colouring and even her teachers have shared how she does some painting almost every day. While at home, she insists we write the date and “Ira Pramadh has gifted this to Papa” on her masterpieces; we were told she does this at school too, gifting her teacher ‘B’ and also one of her favorite aunties, ‘N’.  When love speaks through creations from little human beings, what more can we ask for.

“Can we go meet TC and Luna?”

Ira loves animals, especially dogs. A love we first discovered when she would visit cubbon park on Sundays and was thrilled to see all the dogs. This year, she visited a friend who has two dogs, TC and Luna. While she has told everyone about them and urges her mamma that she and Papa want a dog at home, she takes every opportunity possible to ask, “Can we go meet TC and Luna?”. Guess, friends come in all forms and our little one has discovered the joy of playing with TC and Luna.

“ I will kikkly (quickly) run to ma’am and tell her he hit me!”

While she is very assertive at home and stands her ground, we realize that at school she takes her time to be assertive when someone hits her. Notwithstanding the scratches on her face or arms, when we tell her to confront the child and tell him sternly, she says “ I will kikkly (quickly) run to ma’am and tell her he hit me!”. This is the solution that she thinks is right. While Papa and Joy have more creative solutions to deal with this, her teachers during the PTM told us that this is how they instruct the kids to react if someone hits them. Hitting is a big no and tolerating it is also a big no. Grateful that she doesn’t hit in return, but hoping that she will stand up to anyone who hits her.

“We should do this like a family”

We read together, eat together, dance together to random music (two of us have left feet), go on long drives together, eat ice-cream together, watch movies together and even climb little hills together (papa and Ira race, while mamma trails behind) and sing the finger-song together- “where is the family? Here we are”. The line of the year has to clearly be this and a line we are super grateful for, “We should do this like a family”.

We are grateful for the year that went by and all that she has learnt and discovered and we have too! Looking forward to Year Three. For now, we gear up for the summer holidays, sunny conversations, water play and summer camps!

#Ira #Iraisms #Tales at Three #Parenting #Gratitude #Montessori #Conversations #LittleHumanBeings

The 'First School' for your child - 10 Mantras to help you choose

December is here and with that parenting groups,  mommies groups and school groups are loaded with questions on playschool,  pre-schools, nursery, alternate schools,  montessori method and all discussions pertaining to schooling and school admissions.  It is in some sense a big deal because we need to start the hunt early and if we are choosy,  it makes the hunt even more tedious. While embarking on this search last year, I posted my query on Fb and got some very practical suggestions on how to choose the school. Thank you to everyone who wrote on this thread a year back.

https://m.facebook.com/story.php?story_fbid=10153215440895796&id=675550795

Prashant left the initial groundwork to me. So, I started the way I know best. Made an excel sheet with details about the schools that is easily available and then another set of details got over the phone. Post that we took appointments and went and met the school authorities and saw the premises.

So,  here are the 10 mantras to help you choose a school.

1. The Methodology Followed
Today there are many options. The traditional playschool/nursery method, the montessori method, the Waldorf method, the Steiner method. Read up,  do your groundwork and decide which method will work for your child and you. Parents today have to complement the teaching technique at school with how they also imbibe those learnings at home.
We visited the IMTC website (http://www.indianmontessoricentre.org/schools-recognized-indian-montessori-centre),  did our research and felt that we would like the montessori method. A lot of schools and famous chains claim to use these methodologies but a shocker was that most of their teachers are not even trained or certified.  A very famous chain of schools we visited, the centre head told us we teach multiple intelligence to the children and follow multiple methodologies. So, when I asked her what she meant, she said, you know we use play technique, stories... You wouldn't understand. Yes,  we were actually told that. I was also aghast to see that the pamphlet said they teach kids existential intelligence, whereby teach them about life and death. When asked,  they said we teach them through play. Seriously, teach a two year old. The chain was off our list immediately. Often they rattle off terminologies and jargon,  and underestimate the preparation a parent may have made. I wish they were a tad bit more sensitive to this aspect.

2. Distance between Home and School
These days our toddlers begin schooling very early.  It helps if the travel involved is not much. For them, it is a whole new routine.  Waking up earlier than usual. Getting ready to go to a new environment and meet new people there. Less distance to travel is one less strain avoided. For some parents,  the deciding component would be the distance from their work place to school,  depending upon their arrangement to drop and pick up their baby. See what works best for you. Look at options both near home and work.

3. The Physical Space
The school should have a natural play space. Good ventilation is also essential. Added benefit if they have a ground or garden, have sand-pits and trees. Lot of schools have artificial play spaces, no trees and boast of indoor gyms. We were finicky about this aspect and many schools were struck off the list on this criteria. A word of caution would be that do not go by their photo gallery on their website  or Facebook. Very deceptive to say the least. Some of them looked like they had long corridors and huge halls but later you realise they are small spaces shot smartly and distance between gate and building is few steps. Lack of ventilation is also a concern in many of these playschools. With almost 20 children crammed in a small space, it seemed nightmarish. The school doesn't have to be fancy, it has to be utility friendly for children. One important point is that they must have children friendly toilets with small pots and low level handwash basins. It is a safety requisite. Some schools also had an overboard of cartoons all over. At one place Ira went to the wall and rattled off names of some of the things she recognised- lion, apple, monkey, tree.  While the parent in you feels triumphant,  it is essential to understand if the sensorial element is too much, seems forced. Some plain walls would be good,  you know. Let the children imagine what can cover those walls.

4. The Teaching and Support staff
As parents, we are fiercely protective when we are sending out our children into this big world. One of the ways to maintain sanity is to talk to teachers and also the support staff and see how comfortable you are. While teachers can have qualifications to show, it is essential that they come across as gentle and disciplined and open to understanding that each child is different. The support staff help the children with their toilet time and snack time and helps to talk to them too.

5. Teacher Student Ratio
This honestly is a luxury. Ideally, 10-12 kids per teacher maximum. But this we will know more by observing the space than by asking, because everyone claims to have a very beneficial ratio. One of the big schools kept telling us every class has a teacher and  a help. On close observation, realised that each class has 35-40 kids.  It was a big premises and close to 120 kids at any point of time with just 4-5 help and about 7-8 teachers.

6. Day care
Some of us may be also looking at the Day care option. In such a case, hygiene of the place, the support staff post the school hours and the timings is an important criteria. We were also open to the idea of day care in some time and so kept this in mind.

7. Audio visual component
Why is audio visual component a point here,  you ask? Well,  most of the schools had TV which they claimed they used for edu-infotainment sessions. This meant they showed things that were educational,  informational and entertaining. Honestly,  we didn't see why a school needs that.  We are outliers in the fact that we don't have a TV at home for years and Ira has only recently been introduced to the concept of YouTube and Rhymes or stories online. Unfortunately, two of the places we visited had chota bheem and some other cartoon running loudly and kids sitting very close to the TV. On probing a bit,  a help told us that they put TV during day care time. Exposure to electronic gadgets and TV is a personal choice that parents make and this while was a criteria for us,  may not be a big deal for many.

8. Food /Snack provisions
Some highend playschool provide a curated meal to the children.  While doing your search,  also see if this is a criteria for you.  We were not particular about this facility. But what we were on the lookout was what type of food or snacks is allowed by the school.  Most schools these days do not allow junk of any kind and prefer home cooked meals. This is surely a good thing we see.

9. How they see your Child?
This while an important criteria,  may be difficult to gauge in a single visit. It is interesting to see that behavior ranges from over friendliness to hard selling. Some places make the effort to let the child be, while guiding them to the play area or an interaction space during the first meet. Also,  some schools make us fill a basic form while others ask a lot of questions about the child,  their preferences,  social interactions etc. While a detailed form may seem a tedious thing to fill,  I surely appreciate the effort taken by the school.

10. Let your Child decide
This is the trickiest point in my opinion. How do we know? What could appeal to a toddler?  You will be surprised at how your child reacts to the environment. You will be taken aback at the first things they go and touch at the school -  could be a pebble in the garden,  a colour set or some wooden blocks. Look for their comfort level, how they are able to move around in that space and how they fit in. How they interact with the adults and the other children. A bit of this is what you see,  and a bit would be your intuition about the place. So,  take a step back with your check list,  your excel sheet with highlighted boxes (yes,  I did that too) and just observe.

**Fees is an important criteria but I am keeping it outside this list. Today,  schools depending on the facilities they provide charge fees that does seem exorbitant. So,  the thing to do is while we are deciding on the school,  also see if we can afford the fees and are comfortable with it. Have clarity on what you are paying and what are your expectations from the school.  Understand why schools with special methodologies or alternate schools charge higher than traditional schools. Do your homework so that you feel that you are getting the value for the money you are spending.

Goodluck to all parents and the little adults who are about to make an entry into a whole new world. 

The innumerable new possibilities ahead...

Dear Ira,

You have completed 5 weeks of school. It is a milestone, a milestone for you and a milestone for us. The last few weeks have been a revelation in seeing you in a new environment, adapting, learning, finding your foothold, taking those baby steps. From day one when you walked in without a drop of tear, all smiling and excited to day two, when you wailed your guts out. And on being asked why you crying, you said, " everybody crying". One of the first experiences of yours in collective behaviour this is and there will be many many more. In five weeks now, you go in smiling and you come out happy and for us, that seems like a moment of celebration every single day.

Parenting is complex, and your joining Montessori has made us realise this even more. Day one when you walked in smiling and my eyes swelled up with tears and my racing heart was what parenting is about. That moment when you walked out smiling after an hour of being inside and your Papa fisted his hand in the air and said, yes emphatically is what parenting is about. Parenting is selfish, parenting is about feel good moments, parenting is about hoping there will be less mishaps, parenting is about reading tons of parenting articles in a hope to master the 'parenting', parenting is about letting your heart fight your mind. Parenting is also about discovering the multitude of OCDs. When Papa checks if you have finished your snack and drank water and when mamma checks if you managed to understand 'washroom' instructions and use the facility. Parenting is about making every moment a moment of celebration. Schools today give us the perfect opportunity to do that in style. You had a red day and we proudly sent you in a red attire with a red Frisbee.

These nano achievements give your parents more happiness than they ever imagined. Every Friday is ethnic day and we are stocking up on the kurtis and the crushed skirts and drooling over the fusion themes. You also celebrated Eid and brought home your first greeting card. Awwie!!

We, every moment analyse our choice of the school, we find things that substantiate our choice for you. We as parents do what seems best at that moment for you and we are happy about this choice that we have made.

Ira, you have been a total rockstar these last few weeks. What you have done is big- waking up to an alarm ( yes yes... Papa is getting her used to a frog croaking sound alarm on the ipod), staying away from mamma and papa for few hours, making new friends in a whole new place, listening and following to instructions from teachers and aunties, learning to share your snack box on the way back home when we carpool with a friend, telling us about your day and bringing back small snippets of notices wrapped in your little hands carefully. You have begun to make choices, like choosing a dino school bag over an owl one or a sophie (Giraffe) one. These small steps in decision making will make you an individual by your own right. Even choosing which happy socks to wear! Small decisions but real big deal:)

You have also bravely dealt with a bad bout of infection and the eagerness to go back to school after three days of sick leave just was so awesome. We have learnt that you play hide and seek every other day and also ringa ringa roses. You have told us that you color, aunty sings songs, you have been told " no stamping on the mat" and ofcourse, " swim..swim...oh no!". We are so very glad that your school had the rhyme day for parents and we were finally able to decipher the swim swim poem and have learnt it with the eagerness of a two year old and taken the videos.

There never was a dull moment with you around and in the last five weeks, the entertainment is on a record and repeat mode and we are loving it. There are also challenging moments, but shall leave that for another post.

This is just the beginning of a long journey, a journey where we hope you learn the essence of education, the importance of treating people with love and respect; you discover yourself and you let us discover ourselves as parents. You learn to love yourself and love the world.

While you begin school, we rewind and re-begin a fascinating journey with you.
Looking forward to the play dates, the craft works, the story times and the rhyme sessions, the photos capturing the precious....and the innumerable new possibilities ahead...

Love you to the moon and back,
Your Mamma