"I am so proud of you", the Ira way

Ira celebrated Christmas at school today and it marked the beginning of her holidays.  Ira's vocabulary seems to have exponentially increased in the last few weeks and so her capacity to express herself very articulately. She wants to wear her own shoes,  carry her own bag, eat by herself, make up her own Rhymes and tell stories her way. She says she didn't realise that she was wearing her shoes ulta and that she recognises the alphabet on the book. Realise,  recognise and because are hands down her favourite current words.
As the year closes, it feels overwhelming to see how much she has grown and humbling to realise how much we have as parents learnt. So,  I guess it is fitting that one of my December blogs share all that Prashant and I have learnt so far in this parenting journey. A journey that has just been awesome... and tiring, fabulous and apprehension filled,  full of gawky moments and some perfect strokes.

"I am so proud of you"- a line that Ira tells Prashant and me out of the blue these days,  followed or preceded by, "I love you". This I guess is what is music to the ears,  for Mamma and Papa for sure.

Parenting is a hard task,  nail-biting,  tear my hair moments happen to all of us.  Do not go by the happy pictures and posts that we parents blog and brag about.  Of course,  there are those gem of moments.  But to get there, is a long tedious,  tear filled,  mental screeches filled journey,  multiple camera shots journey.  No complaints whatsoever.  What am trying to say is, like everything in life,  we have to work hard to make parenting work. We have to learn to let go,  we have to learn to let a toddler have their way,  we have to learn that a glass of spilt milk,  a tornado driven toys all over living room is a part of the deal. We have to listen to every little thing they say the way we would listen to another adult,  we have to patiently answer their same question a zillion times because that is what little inquisitive minds do.  There are times when you both are filled with pride that 'we created this'  and there are also times when you think,  'did we really create this!'.

Some things that Prashant and I learnt that has made parenting an even more kickass  a journey for us.
1. Being clingy is their birthright and it can happen anytime anywhere.
2. They are the most well behaved in the most unexpected circumstances.
3. They are riotous in the calmest of situations.
4. Some days their favourite food is all you need to make them happy.  For Ira,  this could be dates,  papaya or chicken leg :)
5. Some days you just have no clue what will work. And trust us,  it is fine.
6. They can read their favourite story book over and over again.  Mind you,  your intonations have to still be animated at the 20th reading in a single day and you dare not skip that para. Her current absolute favourite is,  "Are you my mother?" by P. D. Eastman.
7. They may want to drink milk with spoon,  eat idli with fork,  n pasta with hand.  Let them experience food the way they want to.
8. Mess is good.  Don't be paranoid (note to self). Playing with stick and stones,  throwing mud and cleaning the park is a good thing.
9. Falls,  hurts,  bruises are good and essential for growth.  And of course,  boroline is Ira's best friend,  along with the adage,  'no big deal'.
10. Teach them to love and appreciate people but there will be moments when your most huggy child will not want to hug the visiting friend.  Let them be.  Personal space is an early learning and an essential one at that.
11. You have to feed Bonny,  Leo,  Sophie, Panda and Snowy and shower them too with goodnight kisses,  when your little one takes them to bed with her.
12. Listen careful to their imaginative stories,  play with them,  drink that make believe buttermilk and eat that carrot sabji.  Enjoy that conversation when she asks Bonny to sit with legs crossed and use the activity mat to play.
13. They will be as brave,  as happy,  as adventurous,  as loving as we are.  They reflect what they see. They are our best mirror images.
14. Positive affirmations work wonders.  They need to believe they are smart,  strong,  brave,  loving.  They need to hear it from us.  Be strict,  be stern when needed but those little hands need that comforting hold.  They need to know we are proud of them for what they are.  And this pride is not just quantifiable through achievements or milestones,  this pride is that parental emotion that is ours to know,  experience and express.
15. Discover the child in you through your little one. Preserve that smile,  that memory. These will all be stories to be told and retold.

If you have actually read this long piece,  know for sure that,  "I am so proud of you", the Ira way.

#Iraisms #Ira #Positiveaffirmations #Proudofyou #parenting #learning


Bhavana said…
So very true! You've articulated it so well! Our memories fall short of space to remember what they remember :)
nisultana said…
Hi Madhu nice post. The thing that is interesting is how universal and eternal these feelings are. Your parents would have felt the same pride in you, and Ira may one day discover these joys too. Wonderful journey and I think kids raise parents as much as parents raise kids 😊. But it sure makes one humble and unsure of oneself 😊
Madhurima said…
Thanks Bhavana. True. Capturing the memories through words and I still feel there is still so much to capture.
Madhurima said…
Thanks Devlina. You have said it so well. <3
Parul said…
I loved reading your post and those lessons. Like you rightly said, everything in life brings us lessons and parenting is no different. :)

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