From Ira's Mamma to her Dida
Being a mom is the most difficult task and somehow our mothers made it seem so easy as we grew up! To the silent warriors that our moms have been to the 'let's conquer the world' warriors that our daughters as moms, will one day be <3 day="" happy="" mother="" p="" s="">
When I think of my Ma, there are some memories about food, some about her disciplining and some about the way she deals with relationships in her life. In each of them is a learning that I have discovered latently. She is also the woman I argue the most with, fight with, annoy and at the same time love the most. I don't understand a lot of things she does and why she does them, but I guess she has her reasons like Joy says.
Luchi and Alu and all things sweet!
Today as a mom, when we plan the week menu for breakfast, I realise what a tedious task it is. Ma would make phulkas or luchi or porota on demand every morning. This she would do diligently 365 days a year and I truly wonder how. Mornings were special when it was luchi time. The lunch box variety with khichdi and alu bhaja would be a favorite and the yummy vegetable noodles. Ofcourse the alu posto, the shukto, the maach paaturi and the tomator chutney have had their moments. I today understand that the best way for her to express her love was through making food for us. To date, she makes the best payesh (the Bong kheer) and Joy will concur with this.
The long list of questions and the right thing to do
Ma was always strict in her own way. I will always remember that as a five year old, I once picked something from the road on the way home. Well, I did get some taps on the knuckles but I will always remember that we should never pick anything from the ground. A childhood lesson well learnt. She was my first teacher, she sat with me every evening for the school homework, taught me all the Social Science subjects while Baba taught me Maths and Science. As kids, Joy and I almost saw her life revolve around ours- our studies, our extra-curricular activities and even our exams. Her social calendar was also decided based on our schedules. She was often ridiculed for that but she stood her ground. In modern definition, she would be a SAHM but at that time, it was just taken for granted that she would do everything for us, no need for fancy labels. She was also the one who would deal with our long list of questions. Later of course , Baba received the same barrage as soon as he got home from work. All the times when Baba was out of town for long duration, she managed home and us, with no complaints ever.
People management and all the gyaan that comes with it
Ma is a non-confrontational person. She stays away from arguments and fights. Often growing up I have seen people being rude to her and she won't respond. There have been moments when this angers me but I also understand that it takes a whole lot of strength to be this tolerant. She is a nurturer in every sense, putting the need of the other person before hers. Today of course I fight with her because I tell her that she must begin to think about herself and stand up for herself when someone is not nice to her. But she brushes it aside saying am too 'sposhto bokta' (blunt) like Baba.
Some memories and some moments about Ma that I absolutely treasure
Ma used to be a part of plays for the Durga Puja annual function when we were in Mysore. It was fabulous to see her on stage and even now when I look at those photos, I know where that love for theatre comes from, apart from the microphonic voice.
She used to read a lot of Bengali story books to us as kids, Roop Kotha, being my favorite. I now urge her to start reading them for Ira, because stories always make the best memories.
She also makes the best phulkas and this is something that makes me very snooty about how the phulkas must be. I am far from reaching her standard for phulkas, some day... I live in hope.
In recent times, my favorite moment is when she makes alu bhaja for Ira and her eyes have the same sparkle and glee that Joy and I would have exhibited as kids.
Ma and I are chalk and cheese in many many ways. One common thing that binds us is the love for Chinese food and the fact that the favorite people in our lives are the same. I may not say it enough and one blog post can ever be enough to talk about a parent.
But here it is today, from one mom to another!
Happy Mother's Day Ma!
#grateful #mother #mothersday #memories #love #Ira #Iraisms #childhood